Why Do Men Pull Away When They Are Falling In Love

Why Men Pull Away

Do you ever wonder why men pull away just when they are falling in love with a person? This is an aspect of romance with a man that drives many women crazy, and to be perfectly frank, many men actually stun themselves with this aspect of their behavior. It is not something that all men do, but it does happen so much that many members of the masculine gender are rather stereotyped by such behavior. Backing away from a romantic relationship just as it is getting serious is honestly something women do too, but not with the frequency that men do.

The reasons why a man might do this, of course, vary from person to person, so no individual circumstance should be labeled or assumed. However, there are common themes among men that do this. Insecurity, a desire for freedom, analysis paralysis, and sheer negative instinct are all four common scenarios that might cause a man to pull away from a loved one, right when things are going great.

In the first case, insecurity, a man might not feel ready to become open and vulnerable with someone. This can possibly be a personality flaw, but a lack of maturity and unhealed or repressed emotional wounds might also present themselves in the face of commitment scenarios. Faced with the possibility of dealing with older, painful issues, many men choose to withdraw partially or even fully from a relationship. Having said that, their intentions might actually be well-meaning here, especially if they know their baggage might lead them to be abusive or hurtful to their romantic partner.

The above video is only a quick sample of the useful content over at http://whydomenpullaway.net The full article the accompanies the video is incredibly useful for women, who find themselves in this situation in their relationship with a distant man.

In terms of the second situation, maintaining a desire for freedom, a man might be faced with competing desires. On the one hand, he might truly love a person and want to be with them, but he might also want to remain uncommitted so that he can have fun with other women, or at least be close to the point of being able to do so. The conflict between these two urges can tug at a man to the point of playing it ‘safe’ and backing away a bit.

Analysis paralysis is a third situation that afflicts many men when falling in love or dealing with anything new. Men like to feel like they are at least in control of themselves, even if they are not in control of their lives. So, when their heart makes a leap that their head has not gone through yet, they can be out of sorts for a while until their mind catches up with their emotional state. While thoroughly frustrating for the romantic partner, it is best just to wait them out and hope they come around.

In the last case, a man might actually fall in love with a woman or romantic partner but also just know at an instinctual level that it would never work out or be ideal. These can be very tough cases for both individuals, but if a man is convinced the relationship has no good future, he’ll back away from it before it ever goes anywhere in the first place.

Again, there can be many reasons other than these four cases why men would pull away right when falling in love with someone, and unless you can actually get in their head, it’s almost impossible to know what someone you know is going through unless you talk to them yourself about it.

Tips For a Successful First Date

Tips For A Successful First Date

Almost all of us are probably searching for the special someone that we can spend our lives with. However, if we are completely honest with ourselves, many of us find that our “first date” experiences are nerve-wracking and cause us all sorts of anxiety; there is a reason behind that. That being said, it is not impossible to keep this from happening.

We are here to lend you a hand. Here are five tips that have been proven to bring about a successful first date:

1. Never bring up an Ex:

It is important to remember that a first date is much like a new beginning. What this means is that having a throwback and reminiscing about the past is unnecessary, regardless of how positive or negative it may be. Even though many people do use the ex-talk a lot on first dates due to how easy it is, and usually both parties will have had that “terrible ex.”

Keep in mind that your goal is not to have history repeat itself; this can be avoided if you do not unload these issues on your first date. First dates are meant to be enjoyable, light and fluffy. Not a session dedicated to dramatic ranting.

2. Avoid the Booze:

Usually, most first dates take place at bars or during happy hours so as to provide a relaxed atmosphere. That being said it is definitely not a good idea to get drunk as this will probably ruin your chances of having anything to do with the person that you are interested in. If it is something you can’t help, having a cocktail or two is perfectly normal, however, keep it at that. First impressions are lasting impressions; you want to make a good one.

Other than that, the last thing you want is to be the memory of that date that got plastered during the first date. This is why it is best to avoid going on a drinking spree!

3. A Date is not an Interview:

You are on a first date because you are searching for a new love interest; you are not interviewing a potential business partner. It is completely normal to ask questions; however, you also have to let your date get to know you. We tend to overwhelm our dates with endless questions. It is important not to treat your date as a job interview; it should be meant as something meaningful. Sure ask questions; however allow her to do the same.

 

 

4. Engage Your Date:

Don’t just sit there ticking off points on your “things I am looking for in a girl” checklist. Remember that eye contact is crucial, especially if you are genuinely interested in your date, nothing beats looking them in the eyes.

5. Dress to Impress and Do Not Be Stingy:

As mentioned above, first impressions tend to last. This is why dressing appropriately for a first date is very important. Make sure that you iron your shirt and that it is properly tucked in and, do not wear shorts. When it comes to restaurants, find a fancy one that will fit within your budget. Make sure that you inquire if they have a dress code, this way you know how you should dress for this date.

Keep in mind that no one fancies a cheapskate, so when in front of your date; never complain about the prices, that is a definite turn off. This is why it is important to look for a restaurant that is good yet affordable.

We wish you the very best of luck on your first date.